The Crook Poets Society
ODE TO THE COMMON MAN
Rubbish, rubbish everywhere
But nothing there to eat
Broken bottles on the ground
Playing havoc with my feet
No rain up in the sky
Nor water in my bucket
Nothing to eat or drink agen
Fucket, Fucket, Fucket
THE 10 SECOND LIFE
To the Steve Miller Band
As she leads him around
With his dick in her hand
And writes of her love
In the shifting sand ...
Then whisked away to a far-off land
Where the Warlords gather
And the battlements manned
He writes of his love
With the blood on his hand…
In a flash of white light
And that's the end
HALF A LIFETIME
Through window breaks
From stars and half moon
Riding high on a black velvet sky
With my eyes
I reach to touch and caress
The subtle lines
And tones of your body
Half a moon
Half a night
Half a lifetime
Skrreeech... Crap! Here we go
Crap! Crap! Double Crap! ...
Shoot my dumb butt off
And kill me
RUN TO ME NOW
Hey wait a minute
What are you doing here
Run to me please run to me
Take my hand
Here for you and here for me
Believe in me believe in you
Hey can't you see it hey can you see
Let me in please let me in
I’ll set you free I’ll set you free
Give peace a chance
Give peace in your heart a chance
Walk with me and talk with me
Imagine only you in this world
Only you alone in this world
Walking alone only you
Take my hand please take my hand
Can’t you see oh can’t you see
Believe in you believe in me
Give peace a chance
Let me in please let me in
Imagine only me in this world
Walking alone searching for you
I love you I love you Love me too
Here with you now and here with me
(1) When I do something stupid - You go and stuff it up!
(2) Can you tell me to shut up, I’m giving myself the shits.
(3) I love you regardless of my behaviour.
(4) After the beach. S: My little camelion - You’re a beautiful colour... Anne’: What, am I turning green
(5) Take me for granted, not seriously.
(6) I want to be beautiful for you. But, when I look in the mirror it’s still me again
(7) September ... Anne': I’m going to go and get my beauty sleep. Stephen: See you at Christmas
(9) S: You could stop smoking if you wanted to. A: You could have a sex change operation if you wanted too
(10) S: That’s the dumbest thing you’ve said all day! A: I haven’t been here all day.
(11) Anne’ thinking about her death.... I’m going to start crying, I miss myself already.
(12) I can feel myself getting that vacant look.
(13) A: Shut up you bastard.............. A: What did you say?
(14) Anne’ in a mini skirt... “This is my last shot at it - I refuse to grow old gracefully”
(15) Anne’: I know I ask a lot from you - But, you deserve it.....
(16) Stephen: I’m glade they didn’t come over... Anne’: So are they!
(17) Stephen: Are you ovulating? Anne’: No. I’m just about to pass out....
(18) Anne’: Thank god I made dinner at 5 o’clock this morning!
(19) Anne’ with bandaids all over her arms. Q: Did the cat scratch you again? No! I bit myself and blamed the cat
(20) Next Day - S: Hows the cat? Anne’: We haven’t had a fight yet.
(21) S: Work your problems out... A: It's too late - It's 10 years down the track and you put him up to it you bastard - He tore my arm off - I'm going to sue the fucking cat. S: It's tough at the top.
(22) S: Did you say Oh! or meow! - Anne': I said "Fuck off you moron".
(23) Mr. Vincent, why are you looking so hesitant. It shouldn't stop us going for a walk just because it's pissing down with rain. Mr. V: Meow...
(24) Anne’ thinking about having a Christmas turkey. Mid-September - I hate that turkey already!
(25) Lets go shopping together so we can have a fight!
(26) Forgive me Lord for using your name in vain but, Christ Stephen’s a dickhead
(27) Things come and go in life including yourself...
(28) Don’t look at me like your stupid .....
(29) S: When I’m old and senile will you get me fixed? A: You are old and senile!
(30) Phone: I’ll drop in and see you sometime, if I can remember where you live. By the way, who am I talking to?
(31) It’s your fault I’m fat.... I’d rather be miserable and skinny
(32) Love is loving me no matter how much I stuff up
(33) If I was me I’d follow in my own footsteps !
(34) S: Don't discourage my imagination... A: I'm not, you should see what I'm seeing.
(35) Anne': I forgot what I was saying... Lucky for you!
(36) S: I love your new pink heart dressing gown - It's got princess written all over it. Anne': It's got cat hair, snot, dried egg and vomit written all over it.
(37) S: Finally, the rain is gone, the sun is out and the temperature is nice but it still feels a little bit humid. A: I can't feel anything.
(38) Anne' at the doctors - D: Hows your vision A: Your both looking realy well.
(39) A: It's not a shandy it's a Gandhi.
(40) S: I'm going to celebrate your birthday whether you like it or not - How old are you again?
LOIC & THE CHIN BUTT
He jumped up for a cuddle
And caught me under the chin
His head was in a muddle
My vision started to thin
Who was the bravest going to be...
Was it the 3yrs 10 1/2 month old, or Grandpa me
He didn’t know whether to run for Mum
Or stand his ground and claim his right
This is serious shit... Shite...
I had to think fast before I passed out
Spinning stars and tweety birds - Muscle up and fight
I'm not gona let this little monkey win the bout.
So I told him straight as a gun...
I'm seein stars and tweety birds
Pull out your top pocket little one
Lets stuff it full of tweety birds
The first was too quick around my head
But there were lots here abouch
Got one take it - And it's not dead
More, more, more - Take em - Ouch!!
The little bastard bit me
It's got my by the finger see
Hold it up - Which one - This one Grandpa...
The middle one... Crap...
You kids wear me out
I'm going for my knap
Love yah Pop - I won the bout
Buy the way how’s your head
Fine, he said looking rather clever
Oh not to be 65 but 3 1/2 instead
To be indestructible and live forever